funny quotes wallpapers

Most of us can read the writing on the wall; we just assume it's addressed to someone else. ~Ivern Ball



The way you cut your meat reflects the way you live. ~Confucius



So much fabric, so little time! Or, sew much fabric, sew little time! ~Author Unknown



If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. ~Dalai Lama



Traveler: "God has been mighty good to your fields, Mr. Farmer."



Men have always detested women's gossip because they suspect the truth: Their measurements are being taken and compared. ~Erica Jong



Society is like a large piece of frozen water; and skating well is the great art of social life. ~Letitia Landon



The satisfied, the happy, do not live; they fall asleep in habit, near neighbor to annihilation. ~Miguel de Unamuno, The Tragic Sense of Life, 1913



Well done is better than well said. ~Benjamin Franklin



Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable. ~Bruce Lee



Ancient lovers believed a kiss would literally unite their souls, because the spirit was said to be carried in one's breath. ~Eve Glicksman Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate? ~Will Rogers Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate? ~Will Rogers



Question: " I understand that Congress is considering a so-called 'flat' tax system. How would this work?" Answer: "If Congress were to pass a 'flat' tax, you'd simply pay a fixed percentage of your income, and you wouldn't have to fill out any complicated forms, and there would be no loopholes for politically connected groups, and normal people would actually understand the tax laws, and giant talking broccoli stalks would come around and mow your lawn for free, because Congress is NOT going to pass a flat tax, you pathetic fool." ~Dave Barry



By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. ~Robert Frost By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. ~Robert Frost By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. ~Robert Frost



The secret to happiness is to put the burden of proof on unhappiness. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com



Men grow tired of sleep, love, singing and dancing sooner than of war. ~Homer, Iliad



A good book should leave you... slightly exhausted at the end. You live several lives while reading it. ~William Styron, interview, Writers at Work, 1958



You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash



In books lies the soul of the whole Past Time: the articulate audible voice of the Past, when the body and material substance of it has altogether vanished like a dream. ~Thomas Carlyle



Against Him those women sin who torment their skin with potions, stain their cheeks with rouge and extend the line of their eyes with black coloring. Doubtless they are dissatisfied with God's plastic skill. In their own persons they convict and censure the Artificer of all things. ~Tertullian



If addiction is judged by how long a dumb animal will sit pressing a lever to get a "fix" of something, to its own detriment, then I would conclude that netnews is far more addictive than cocaine. ~Rob Stampfli